Heat Induced Hallucinations

Waking up in my own bed, hearing the train blare its way through the station, and feeling the cool breeze from my fan waft its way over my hips kind of makes me wonder: Did I dream last weekend? Maybe it was a heat induced hallucination from yesterday afternoon.

Kidding. But it's still rather surreal.

So for those of you who don't know, I drove down to So-Cal with my friend Miss J for the weekend, so I could be at Disneyland for my birthday. The general vibe of the weekend was, shall we say, awesome? We talked about life and food practically nonstop the drive down, and the drive back. My cousin was able to get us in for free with park hoppers tickets, which means the Tower of Terror and Soarin' Over California SO happened. I think Tower of Terror is at its best when you haven't been on it for a while; you forget what it feels like to be free falling and swear that your stomach just jumped out of your eye sockets. Soarin' Over California always wants to make me cry. But for good reasons. It's such a magical experience that if the lines weren't so long, I'd totally go on it over and over and over again.

I've also decided that it's the right time to think about transitioning into being completely vegan. I eat that way most of the time anyway, and with my increasing experience in cooking and research (the dessert pizza vegan-style was freaking AMAZING), I've realized how easy it is. I never thought being vegetarian could come so naturally, and so I have no doubts that I can succeed at cutting dairy and eggs completely out of my diet. I really have enjoyed it, because it's gotten me so inspired about cooking different things (or cooking at all), experimenting, and being conscious about what I'm putting in my body.

Tied to that though (food issues), is something I'm coming to recognize in myself. There's something called overeating, or compulsive eating disorder. It's not bulimia, because one doesn't try to make up for the binges by puking or excessively exercising, but one does go through periods of binging. It may not be constant, and I don't think I have it as bad as others do (and I've found short term ways of controlling it). I used to call it sugar binging; I have this mentality that when sugar is in the house (or other trigger foods like chips or crackers), I need to eat it all in one sitting (or two), so it's gone and won't be tempting me any longer. And as you can probably guess, it turns into a vicious cycle. Right after my boot camp thing ended, I fell into a week long period of occasional binging. And guess what? It's been hard to stop. This is a journey I'm just now embarking on, so we'll see where it takes me.

What else! School starts tomorrow, and all my classes start in the afternoon. I'm planning on getting a pass at the ARC on campus for their group classes so I can start doing yoga with other people again, and maybe some other classes too. It's been bloody hot the last few days, and therefore my apartment has been a little warmer than usual. Luckily it cools down at night and with the windows open, it's no problem.

I'm also working on a new song (no title so far) inspired by the tendency relationships have (no matter what kind they are) of failing, because both parties may not want the same thing, or they fail to express what they want and therefore there appears to be a conflict of interest, and most often people literally cannot understand another person from their own perspective. So far it's written to evoke fairy tale-esque themes and imagery; I'm excited about it!